Monday, April 21, 2014

R is for Retro: Why I'm Not an Illustrator

The A to Z Challenge will make you do crazy things. Today, in an attempt to get some quick blog content up so I can focus on editing, I'm sharing some embarrassing childhood poetry I found over the weekend. With pictures!

I'm estimating this retro poetry to be from around third or fourth grade. Today's excerpt comes from my limited-edition, self-published (and self-crafted) book, Sea Poems.

Try not to be blown away by my cover art...

I'll set the stage for this work of pure poetic genius by sharing the illustration first. A few points of note:

  • That is not a magic carpet. It's a beach towel.
  • The snorkeler is wearing partially-drawn scuba equipment. I assure you this isn't a technical oversight but rather a philosophical statement about how doing things halfway will result in your demise. (Case in point: this man's snorkel did not extend beyond the water, and his only back-up plan was his incomplete scuba gear. I'm sorry to say he didn't make it.)
  • Depth perception has never been my thing.

And now, the poem you've all been waiting for. This gem speaks for itself:

I'll leave you to wipe away the single tear that's rolling down your cheek. 

Happy Monday, everyone! Is it Z yet?


  1. Awesome post!

    Please visit my blog,

    I'm also participating in the A-Z Challenge and my theme focuses on books and the titles of them, which will begin with the letter of the day!

  2. Thanks for stopping by, Michelle! Your blog is awesome.